Tales of Li'l Foot

…my kid pooped on the couch…excuse me…my kid pooped ont he “sofa”.  Sorry, people would correct me if I was at work and said “couch” instead of “sofa” because OH MY GOOGLYMOOGLY THEY HAVE NO FREAKING LIVES!!!

Anyway, as I was saying, my kid pooped on the sofa tonight.  HUbbie had run out to the store for some things, and I was baking cookies and working with LF to go potty because she “said” she had to go!  The timer was keeping time for the cookies.  The oven was hot.  The tv was on.  The dog was following me around…gosh darn him.  The cat was hiding.  Dang it, I wish I could hide.  Gaaaahhhh!!!!

I put her on the potty.  She sat.  And she sat.  She asked for the National Geographic magazine.  She asked for a wet one so she could clean her feet. Side note: apparently when LFD take LF to the potty, she’s gotten into the habit of asking for a wet one and spends her time sitting ont he potty cleaning her feet with the wet one.  So strange, but whatever.  Quality time spent or the two of them together on the potty, I guess.

She decided she didn’t need to go.  I was just about finished with the cookies and figured she didn’t have to go potty, so I let her go bare bottomed.  I know, I know, I’m such a glutton for punishment.  Shush!  She toddled around, and then wound up on the couch damn it, sofa!  I was keeping a close eye on her, I swear I was.  I was watching for any body language that said I’m totally going to pee right here and now mommy.  That body language never happened.  I swear she is stealth poop-er/pee-er.

And then it happened.  She was standing on one side of the sofa, looked up at me and said, “poopie?”!!!  Gaaaahhhhh…gross!!!  Thank God for leather sofas!!!  Why me, Lord, why me?!?!?!  It was easy enough to clean up.  I swept her off to the bathroom to sit on the potty and think about what happened.  I tried to remain positive (which was so darn hard let me tell ya).

I just don’t know what else to say!